Does anyone else feel that with each and every daily choice, they are in a flirtatious tug-of-war game with the Big C?
When anyone chooses to heal from cancer naturally, you know you have to stick to the lifestyle and diet you healed from for as long as possible, but at what point can you lay off a bit?
This is what I mean:
Yesterday I ate the Budwig mixture, juiced 32 oz of vegetable juice, took all of my supplements, and had a banana, blueberry, broccoli sprout, avocado, coconut water smoothie for a snack. For lunch I had a vegan veggie burger with steamed vegetables. For dinner I had spaghetti squash and lentil spaghetti. All organic.
Then there’s the other stuff I ate, like the massive amount of organic corn chips and peach salsa I snacked on while feeding my 10 month old daughter lunch. And the coconut sugar-sweetened, whole wheat chocolate chip cookie cake I made for my husband and daughter to eat to bring a little joy to this ice storm Atlanta is currently experiencing. I ended up eating a piece on top of eating a good amount of dough in the prepping process.
Sugar. Butter. Wheat. Not at all anti-cancer (even if it WAS all organic…do you HEAR me trying to justify this!?)
And everyday pretty much has a variation of this same behavior, with the exception of dessert…which is much less frequent. But I did have ice cream twice this month…like a cup. Maybe two? Eeek.
I do have a sense of peace, knowing that by choosing to treat my cancer naturally, I haven’t compromised my immune system, but there is always that question: Is what I’m doing ENOUGH to keep it away? How often can I have dessert? Once a month? Once a year? Never?
Then lets add in sleepless nights with one child peeing the bed and the other waking up to nurse and the lack of exercise, along with my terrible nail biting habit, the MSG in the Chick-Fil-A salad I actually ate the other day with no other options….and <hyperventilating>……….
BREATHE. EXHALE 10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1….
I am healthy, I am strong, I am healed. My Heavenly father has this in His hands.
So where do I go from here? I remember 5 1/2 years ago, being just few months into my healing protocol and wondering “How much longer do I have to do this for!?” Eating to heal from cancer can be incredibly lonely and isolating. But we must stay the course, and eventually it becomes one that you want to follow and CRAVE the foods that nourish and heal our bodies.
You end up teaching others and being a light to the people you come in contact with over a meal.
I follow a few health gurus on Facebook who evoke two opposite emotions out of me. The first is anger. I get angry at their healthy-ness. I get angry that I can’t eat as well as they do and do yoga on the beach in my hours of spare time. I get angry that they don’t have children and it’s so easy for them to juice all day, eat chia and hemp salad with homemade dressing, and grow their own sprouts.
The other is healthy conviction. They keep me motivated and learning. Driven. They teach me new things because I am realizing quickly that something new is always trending in the natural health world.
And I’m sure they eat organic cookie dough too, they just don’t write about it. (:
***UPDATE: Just wanted to clarify that I RARELY bake in my house. If you make it, you WILL eat it. The last time I baked something unhealthy was for my oldest daughter’s birthday in November (and that was a whole wheat organic birthday cake with beet-colored homemade icing…but yes, to someone with current cancer- that is too much sugar and should be avoided.)
I find that eating anything that is NOT cancer-fighting often opens up a door to temptation that is hard to reverse. Once you start eating sugary things again, you will continue to eat more and more sugary things. The same goes for snacky things. What your weakness was before you began your natural healing protocol will become your weakness again if you introduce it back into your diet. We all must be careful with this, including myself. (:
Thanks for this. My brother has been fighting stage 4 Hodgkins for 5 years with conventional treatment and losing the battle…badly. He has now decided to go raw, vegan and approach it holistically. He is 38. His entire family is following suit and supporting him in the process with making the diet changes ourselves. This is a HUGE lifestyle change for him; it’s nice to know that he may, in time, be able to have a few indulgences. 🙂
All the best to him!! Def add Essiac Tea and Transfer Point Beta Glucan to his protocol.
I need to know all I can ! Thanks Courtney
I love reading your page. You’ve been a wonderful inspiration for me in my cancer journey. I am always looking for more healthy advice. Curious to know who are the two health guru’s that you follow on Facebook?
Thank you!!!
Hey Paige, hahaha, yes- I follow A LOT of people…but Kris Carr, Wellness Mama, Mama Natural, Cherie Calbom (The Juice Lady), Mommypotamus, and Chris Wark are my favorites.
Well, it’s good to know that others cheat! I eat organic chips and Paul Newman Salsa everyday now. And you are right! I find myself eating it more and more often. Also I indulge in organic popcorn cooked with coconut oil and organic butter. Delicious! I do juice every day almost. I’ve only had cancer since August, but it was stage 0 DCIS,
Great article and so true!
I must say that your mind set must be one of -no fear- because fear is believing (negative believing) and God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind. Please do not act out of fear of getting cancer again. Trust God continually and let the peace of God rule in your heart! God Bless!
maybe my comment little late but I am new in all of this ..I discovered I have Breast Cancer while I am pregnant ..I just had almost a month ago my mastectomy but this would be it ..I am on healthy diet now and it started all by CHRISbeat cancer and your website ……
I know exactly what you mean and more ..would you have any advise to me during the pregnancy or after in the early days
J
Jihanne- please click on all of the links within my “How I Beat Cancer” page. I write a lot about dealing with pregnancy and cancer. Prayers for you!!!
So excited to step into a new frontier of feeling better. Cheers to all of your great experiences and sharing your stories. I heard once that our Health is our Wealth, and that is the walk I am on now.
In 2 more months I will celebrate being cancer free for 3 years. I am vegan. I eat 70% raw foods. There are times I do let myself cheat, but I make sure it’s a homemade treat from a friend (like a cupcake) or dark chocolate. I chose conventional and alternative therapy (I was stage 4 rectal cancer and bleeding out when I was admitted into hospital) I think it’s ok to eat what you want on occasion… it makes it more special and I remember when I was a kid drinking a Coke was a special occasion not a daily staple like it is now.
Be well!
I enjoy reading your blog 🙂
@Jason C
Yup gone forever. I have stage 3 Non hodgkins and my body reacts if i eat a grape! I will NEVER have that kind of splurge again. This diet is keeping the C at bay. I know 100% if I went back to that diet you describe, I would be in Chemo smart quick. As a matter of fact my son got married in Aug, Diet was great but I had a few drinks (2 Campari, couple of beers and three martinis) over a week period and some of the tumors grew 25%. So I’m back on the wagon. A resistant teetotaler, but I don’t like the alternative.
I agree with what all of you are saying – it feels right to continue to eat in the most nutritious way possible – but it is so easy to fall back into the sugar and salt trap – reading all of your posts helps me to know that this is a normal part of the daily struggle of dealing with cancer and post-cancer treatments – Thank you for the motivation to stop the sugar again and recommit without guilt and self anger –
I lost too much weight and felt awful when I was given a special diet and tried to stick to it. I can’t digest any beans and some other non animal good proteins. I’m good about taking my supplements and when I eat something sweet or extra carbs I keep my blood sugar from spiking by taking chromium, cinnamon or green coffee extract and/ or gren tea extract so I don’t get that insulin spike which feeds cancer stem cells.I also try to walk at least 25 min a day. I don’t know if this is an answer but now I don’t have hardly any body fat even though I eat avacado and good fats every day. I don’t really eat junk foods but I’m not a purist either. My blood sugar is now lower compared to blood test when I wasn’t so vigilant about keeping it low. I never was really high but higher than I wanted it since breast cancer dx. I’m 61 and now a size 2or4. Also since cortisol is a nono for cancer I take PS and ashwaganda and use a mushroom extract with cordyceps and drink Tulsi tea all good for stress and reducing cortisol. I don’t know if this is the right approach but I presently feel well and more relaxed. Iwas dx 2 yrs ago, had a masectomy and refused chemo. Of course I pray everyday for Gods wisdom and guidance.
Do any of you ever let it all hang out? I’m talking like having a Friday where you start with a bag of donuts, then for lunch a big burrito at Jose Peppers. In the evening you go to a fancy steak restaurant where you have an 12oz KCStrip, loaded baked potato, and lobster risotto. At dinner you also had 3 glasses of wine before heading to the bar area to have a few glasses of scotch. An entire day of nothing organic or even remotely good for the human body. Are those days completely gone for natural cancer survivors?
THAT much splurging us completely gone for me I’d say! I’ll write a little more about this on a later post. (:
Thank you for sharing your story. And thank you to the followers who mentioned mothers. I have three children under 10 (one 17 months) I was diagnoised with breast cancer on January 31, 2014. On this day I switched from a vegan diet to a primary raw diet and sought care from a wholistic doctor. I have been fighting with medical doctors to skip chemo. I am at the point where I may not go that route at all.
I just tripped over your blog and much appreciate your sharing. I am following a Macrobiotic lifestyle myself, and feel great but it is a lot of cooking and time in the kitchen. However, the cancer has a stronghold on me and it’s been 3 years. I know that I can never go back to the way I used to eat. And agree with your post, it’s a slippery slope. I’ll feel great and think this one snack can’t hurt, can it? and then that didn’t do any harm so I have another, and before you know it I’m still eating great meals but snacking too often. In Macro we use rice syrup and barley malt and also apple juice or apple sauce as sweeteners. I would never eat sugar even organic. /i find also stevia and agave have a bad reaction in my body.
Keep up the good work. You just don’t know how many people you are inspiring. I feel a groundswell thanks to the internet, that more and more people are giving natural remedies consideration.
I don’t have cancer but would like to share how we’re hopefully keeping it away:
1. I make tinctures with a combo of 14 organic herbs & spices, doubling the turmeric.
2. I make a green smoothie every morning with about 10 different organic powders and seeds, and several liquids.
3. I make colloidal silver by the gallon and we drink lots everyday & add it to ours & our dog’s Berkey filtered water.
4. We add Regal Liquid Manna to our water, which is 100 % oxygenated.
…all of these are so packed with nutrients and super nutrients, antioxidants, omega-3’s, anti-bacterial (& all other bad germy stuff), as well as totally immune boosting, there isn’t much need to have to swallow supplements, except for vitamin D3…we don’t get sick.
We also eat organic as much as possible.
We need to setup a support group. I was so proud of myself today. Every Tuesday our family go watch a movie because it is only $5 a movie. My family including me love popcorn with tons and I mean tons of butter. Kids didn’t go with us this time so I told my husband that I can’t eat popcorn anymore and he actually told me that is fine. So glad but it was so hard to smell the yummy popcorn. I would eat things I shouldn’t but then remind myself that I must detox afterwards by eating things with a lot of antioxidant and remember to take all my supplements to make sure my body get rid of all the bad things I just put in. I would say that I’m good 80% of the time, like to be 90% at least.
I have to say that it’s very helpful to hear the comments…somehow I started to feel like the only one who was dealing with this issue. Funny how isolating yourself and NOT talking about it then makes the situation worse than it needs to be.
I definitely find that kids can really mess you up! LOL The biggest issue is that I buy stuff for them that I would never bring into the house otherwise, so then it’s there in the cabinet in reach. On top of that, I prepare them food I wouldn’t prepare otherwise…buttering an ‘everything’ bagel that you are not otherwise wanting to eat can be torture for a former lifelong carb-a-holic. I find that it’s really all about perspective though.
Just within the last weeks, I’ve been pressing in more than ever to my relationship with God and really trying to understand my true identity in Him. That has honestly been the only thing that has put me in a position to make quality decisions regarding my food choices in a given moment.
Cortney, we should start an online support group just for this!
So hard Courtney. I keep craving for so many things. It doesn’t help when you about to hit menopause and/or that time of the month. Feel very drained and it is hard to keep on track.
Thanks for sharing this… it’s encouraging for others who are struggling with sticking to the regime of eating healthy. 🙂 May God continue to give you wisdom and strength.
It is such a common problem! Thank you for writing about it. You are awesome Courtney!
Thanks Tasha!
Got it. Now I see. (:
Cortney,
I was responding to the other Courtney who talked about her recurrence in her comment. I did not think you had any recurrences.
For all those out there reading this, I should confess in Cort’s defense that whenever we fall off track with desserts and such, it is almost always my fault – as I love to celebrate with certain foods from time to time (who doesn’t right?). But as Cort’s husband and biggest advocate, I need to continue to do my part in bolstering and equipping our family in the health choices we made together 6 yrs. ago and counting! – Love you babe 🙂
Wow! You must have been completing reading my mind. I am in a bit of a rut myself. I have sadly fallen off the horse and given into cravings, overeating, snacking and tons of sugar in the last few months. I don’t feel as good, my skin isn’t as radiant as it once was, I have gained weight (writing a weekly vegan blog hasn’t helped!) and I am fearful. Will cancer return again? I have gone for years for being that determined person to only put things in and on my body that are completely GOOD for it. I know that I can climb back on the horse, but it’s challenging. I needed this great reminder today. Not that I don’t want to enjoy some sugar or a glass of wine now and again (because I will), but I needed this encouragement to eat healthier starting (again) today. Just because it’s been years since my last cancer diagnosis, doesn’t mean that it won’t return (a thought all of us cancer cowgirls and cowboys likely live with day to day). Thank you for being the little kick in the butt I needed! We are all in this journey together and help, hand holding and reminders are so appreciated. XO
Kayle- Isn’t it so nice to admit publicly that we are not these perfect health freaks that blog about our perfect diets!? I’m so glad that you found this helpful. Keepin’ it real, cowgirl!!! Miss ya! (:
I haven’t been very good in fact gaining weight because I started eating junk food and work is getting to me. Very worry. Will get back on track, thanks for posting this to get me back on track. Will be praying for you Courtney, I know you will do fine with Bill’s Protocol.
Maly, stay the course. You are doing so well! I keep it really simple in my day to day and still eat almost the same thing everyday. I’m going to be writing about this more in a later post. (:
I agree. Courtney, I am so sorry to hear about your recurrence. You will be way ahead of those who do chemo and still eat junk.
Cortney, I look forward to your posts. One thing I’m trying to avoid now is making food my “god”. I think when I had cancer, I really had to focus daily on it, but now that I don’t have cancer, there needs to be a way that my family and I meet in the middle, and food doesn’t consume all my thoughts and energy. There are more important things in life. However, I never want to have cancer again.
It is quite the juggling act.
Tasha
I agree about it being a juggling act and making food an idol. There’s the faith aspect that should comfort!
Oh, and I have NOT had a recurrence. Just a small but important detail I wanted to let everyone know!! Looking back at my blog post to see where I might have been confusing…
I smiled when I read this because I know exactly what you mean. I find that there are times when Organic and healthy aren’t always a possibility. Its the feelings of guilt, frustration, fright, and sometimes just plain being tired of all the preparation for every single thing I have to eat. I do crave the right foods but in the winter especially when farm fresh isn’t available I find it difficult to always eat whats right. The foods are expensive and not always readily available.
I know that this is the way to go as after being diagnosed in January of last year with 4th stage breast cancer that metastasized to my bones and given a prognosis of you are just going to kill yourself doing it the natural way I am happy to say that one very large tumor is completely gone and the others are decreasing steadily. I haven’t done any chemo and only one dose of Radiation on a very large tumor. I have been very healthy and not been sick one day since. My bones are actually healing back to good and I am doing great but I still worry that I am not doing it all like I should be. I put it all in Gods hands and do what I can to eat right and stay the course. Its not always easy and on busy days it feels like almost impossible but when you remember what it could have been with the surgeries and chemo and anything else that modern medicine wanted to do to me, I probably wouldn’t be here writing this today.
Thank you for letting me know that I am not the only one who feels this way and that its ok.
Hi Courtney and Tasha!
We really need to keep this conversation going because CONTINUING support for our healing journeys is needed. It’s so easy to be tempted, especially after remission for a certain amount of years (or even months at first.) I have been working on a post about having a family and dealing with your cancer naturally, but it’s turning into a series of several posts because it’s such a common problem for us!
Cortney
You HIT the nail on the head. I smile along with you as I envy those food bloggers with sponsors to pay their bills and no kids to feed while they follow their food dreams…… Middle age women with kids and cancer is not for the faint of heart!
I was trying to do the food thing and was almost successful for 2.5 years. But like you I cheated and ate “healthy” sweets along the way. I don’t think I stuck to a strict enough raw or vegan diet for long enough and didn’t understand the depth or breadth of my family history of cancer. I am dealing with a recurrence and mets to my bones and with 2 boys ages 6.5 & 8 I got scared and have started chemo which goes against everything I have read or lived for 2.5 years. I’m hoping that my healthy eating habits will get me through the few rough months.
I look forward to your updates because I know this kind of healing is possible and I admire you for doing it.
Thank you for this post! Since I’ve been diagnosed back in February with Pap Thyroid Cancer as a 39 year old Californian woman living in the UK, I have been back and forth..meaning that yes I have done the same..Some days when Im on my period or when I just feel like ‘I don’t care’ I will eat whatever I want: wheat, sugar, etc. and then I feel so guilty. It’s so hard. It is a lifetime battle and I want to win it! Thank you for this post and for this website. I stumbled upon it when I was looking at Chrisbeatcancer, yet another inspirational site. Thank you! I have your website saved on my bookmarked favorites 🙂
Thank you, Linda! I totally understand the emotional side of being a woman and this whole natural healing thing. Know that this is a season where you have to be very strict and strong. Later there will be a time when you’re healed and healthy and perhaps you can indulge a little bit, but stay the course for now!!! (:
I know exactly how you feel! It has been 1 year since I was declared cancer free, using nutrition and natural therapies (your blog was one inspiration to me during that time, thanks!). It was so hard to stick to my strict diet, but now it is almost harder to decide daily what I can/should eat, and all too often I eat things I know I shouldn’t. I still eat a whole foods diet, but it is nothing like when I had cancer.
One of my biggest challenges is feeding a growing family (we have 9 children), while still trying to stick to a great diet for myself. If I eat the way that keeps me healthy and lean, then my family complains that they are always hungry. They are all willing to help in the kitchen, but it takes a lot of food preparation by me as well.
Anyway, it was just fun to read your blog post and know that there are others who aren’t always doing yoga on the beach while sipping green juice. Some of us have to have real lives as well. 🙂
Thanks for sharing.